Stay Cool--DC in August Edition

I'm not telling you anything you don't know, but August in DC is hot and humid. Congress flees the city to avoid it, their staffers flee the city because they do what their congressman tells them, and lobbyists take this opportunity to flee to their beach houses in Rehoboth. I mean, the heat shuts the government down.

(Okay, I know, TRADITIONALLY, Congressmen were given an August break to go back home and tend to their farms before/during harvest, but we don't have a lot of gentleman farmers on Cap Hill anymore. Yet the break remains. Go fig.)

All of this flight leaves the rest of us to fend for ourselves in sultry, swamp-like conditions. How are we to cope?

Enter the Arnold Palmer. Half Iced Tea, Half Lemonade, 100 percent refreshing and delicious. I probably drink between 18-20 glasses/week of this nectar, and never get sick of it. Ever. Well, sometimes I do, actually.

When you hold a particular drink as often as I hold an "AP", you begin to think of ways to make it better. Sadly, it can't be done. HOWEVER, subtle changes yield exciting and wonderful new flavors so foreign to the original as to warrant a different name entirely. I mean, Arnie can't be all things to all people--he's just one drink. And a golfing legend.

What do I mean? Well, allow me to submit to you some new combos for you to try this week as you try to stay cool, Murray.

NEW NAMING CONVENTIONS--ARNOLD PALMER MODIFIED BEVERAGES

• Iced Tea + Lemonade= Arnold Palmer
• Iced Tea + Lemonade + Vodka= John Daly
• Iced Tea + Pink Lemonade= Nancy Lopez
• Green Iced Tea + Lemonade= Jumbo Ozaki
  
• Green Iced Tea + Pink Lemonade= Michelle Wie? (Weak, I know)
• Iced Tea + Lemonade + Whiskey= Padraig Harrington

I could go on forever, but this should get you through this week, at least. Serve over ice.